I remember Christmas with my parents as if it were yesterday – dress up in our best dresses for the midnight candle-lit Christmas mass at our church and waking up to presents on Christmas morning. My happy place was being with my family – my parents and my siblings.
When my parents died, I thought that they took my happy place with them. Christmas no longer meant anything to me. Even celebrating my birthday did not bring me joy. My focus was on doing well in school and working to make sure my sister and I had something to eat. For over a decade I didn’t have a happy place as such; writing was my escape from the harsh realities of my life.
Looking back, I now realise that finding a happy place is a choice. Yes, loosing a loved-one may make that choice harder; but being happy is indeed a choice. Grieving is never easy – you may grieve for years without truly feeling any better about your loss. Nevertheless, it is important to learn to live your life in spite of the pain. I am living proof that YOU CAN live a happy life no matter what lemons life throws at you. Finding your happy place IS possible. The secret is to never let anyone take your happiness from your hands. Even if you go through tough situations, make sure that your happiness is within your reach so that you can access it whenever you feel you need to (hopefully as often as possible).
Today I have reached a point in life where my parents are still a part of my happy place. Thinking of them and the time we spent together makes me happy. This does not mean that I am stuck in the past; this simply means that I have learnt to turn an unfortunate situation into an inspiring one. My happy place is the love I have for “my people”.When I think of the people I love I feel safe, I feel happy and I feel grateful. The newest addition to my happy place, my beloved daughter, has confirmed that YOU CAN BE HAPPY again after trauma.
If you are feeling down, overwhelmed or you just need someone to talk to, please do not hesitate to contact me. If you’ve lost your happy place and you don’t know how to find it again, I would love to help you by hearing your story and telling you about mine and how I came to terms with my situation. My email address is firstname.lastname@example.org and my door is always open.
Peace & Love,